These past couple of months have been a whirlwind – so much so that I didn’t get a chance to post an April update last month. Life and ministry have been full and busy! With that, I am going to do an update on both the months of April and May together. Here goes.
Ministry
These last couple of months at Kaleo, we did a series on the Song of Solomon. This was probably the most challenging series for me to tackle from a teaching standpoint, as Song of Solomon is actually a deceptively complicated and layered book of the Bible, and the content is obviously not something that is regularly taught in the church, much less a college group. That said, the series was extremely fruitful, and a lot of great feedback was given by everyone in the group.
One of the most memorable nights was the Relationships, Marriage, and Sexuality Q&A that we had midway through the series. Many people asked some very tough questions, but our panel which consisted of Bob and Nancy Speizer, Freddie and Deanna Gallardo, and Melissa Yocum all answered with incredible wisdom and insight. Our group was challenged and edified.
Aside from the regular rhythms of ministry, we’ve also had some great events that have helped to strengthen the community of Kaleo and the college/young adult age group in Elk Grove as a whole. One rhythm that has just begun this last month is something called “Summer In the Park”, where multiple college groups from different churches across Elk Grove have decided to get together bi-weekly to hang out and fellowship. My hope and prayer are that these hangouts would be a good space for people to invite friends and introduce them not only to the community of Kaleo, but also to the faith community in Elk Grove as a whole. I’m excited about where these events will lead!
Looking ahead, these next couple of months are filled with camps, retreats, and mission trips. Ministry really ramps up for college ministry in the Summer months, so I’m putting my spiritual war paint on, and am ready to tackle these next couple of months with diligence. My desire is that this Summer would not just be full of fun and adventures for the students, but also a Summer full of growth. I am praying to that end!
Life
The biggest personal update I have is…I bought a house!
I officially got my keys to my new home on May 12th, 2022. The weeks that followed were filled with projects, painting, and moving; and honestly, most of it is a blur in my mind as I sit here typing this. However, one thing is abundantly clear to me – my family and my community showed up in full force to help and support me in everything. Whether it was scraping off the popcorn ceiling and then texturing it, painting the living room, or packing up and moving all my boxes and furniture, I never had to do anything alone. I’m in awe and humbled by the lord’s provision – not only in the form of a house I now own, but in the form of His people who were so generous with their time and resources.
I want to give a huge thanks to my parents, brothers, and extended family, first and foremost. But I’d also like to recognize these others by name: Chris Sapinoso, Nathan and Eva Lowe, Ezekiel and Mehgan Tamayo, Charles Williams, Noah Byerly, Maddie Coronado, Noah Schlaegel, Jace Miller, Garrett Koch, and Tanner Glenn. You guys rock, and I couldn’t have done it without you.
Moving on – I spent this Easter with some great friends out at Aaron’s ranch. This was a particularly fun time hanging out with the roomies and Aaron’s sheep, and it definitely deserves a special shoutout!
One of the most refreshing parts of these past two months was getting to take a short weekend getaway to Santa Cruz at the end of May. With the stresses of ministry and moving, my soul definitely needed to decompress. I got to stay with my good friends Willy and Maureen (whose wedding, if you remember, I was in back in March), which was incredibly life-giving and refreshing. I also had different friends come down to Santa Cruz to join me by the beach and hang out, which was super fun.
Though life has been tiring and much endurance has been required, I’m finally getting settled into my new place, and I am remembering to be thankful. I have way more than I deserve, and that reality is not lost on me.
Soul
If I had to use one word to describe the state of my soul these past couple of months, it would be “stormy”. I shared in a recent Instagram post that at some points I have felt like a kite dancing around in a hurricane, and at others like a sailor clinging to the mast of a ship in the middle of a tempest. Those sentiments are still the same, although I would say its gotten better over the last week or two.
At times, I have felt like the disciples in a boat with Jesus asleep in the stern during the storm in Mark 4:35-41, and particularly with what they said to Jesus in verse 38: “Do you not care that we are perishing!?” If I’m honest, I’ve asked that question of Jesus more than a few times in the last 60 days.
When my capacity has felt stretched thin to the point of breaking, I’ve asked Jesus if He even cares.
When the transition of moving out of an old house and into a new house has put my whole life in bundles of cardboard boxes, I’ve asked Jesus if He even cares.
When I’ve found moments alone to get alone, and have felt there in quiet moments the sting of past mistakes and heartache weighing heavy on my soul, I’ve asked Jesus if He even cares.
But I’ve been reflecting on what happens next in the story of Jesus Calming the Storm in Mark 4:35-41. Obviously, we know Jesus ends up waking up and calming the storm (it’s in the title, after all). But what is really interesting is what Jesus first says to the disciples after He does so. He doesn’t comfort or empathize with them, attempting to reassure them that He does, in fact, care. He doesn’t launch into a parable or a theological treatise. He doesn’t even say anything particularly profound. He simply asks a question.
“Why are you so afraid?”
Like me, I’m sure when the disciples shook Jesus awake and asked Him if He even cared, the question probably sounded more like anger and frustration rather than outright fear. But Jesus saw right past that. If this story shows us anything, it shows us that our anger and frustration with God is usually just a mask for fear; fear that we are unwilling or unable to acknowledge.
But what were the disciples actually afraid of? What’s interesting about this story is that technically, the disciples never asked Jesus to calm the storm, or asked why He hadn’t up until that point. As a matter of fact, their question to Jesus had nothing to do with the storm. It had everything to do with Him. “Do YOU not care that we are perishing?” In moments of desperation, our deepest insecurities and fears have a way of coming to the surface. And in this story, we see that happening. What the disciples were truly afraid of wasn’t the storm. What they were afraid of was that Jesus didn’t care – that He was cold and apathetic to their plight.
But Jesus’ second question to the disciples is equally as important as the first. “Have you still no faith?” It’s a question that happens to show us the solution to our fear. It isn’t courage, though courage is produced from it. It’s faith. Trusting in the character and the promises of God. Remembering how He’s been faithful and has come through before. And believing that He will do so again, and again, and again.
Jesus never said that adjustments or storms wouldn’t occur in life. On the contrary, He promised them (John 16:33, Mark 8:34, Matthew 24:9). An older pastor once shared with me, “Life is not just ‘filled’ with adjustments, Andrew. All of life is an adjustment.” A different mentor also told me once that there are only three kinds of seasons in life: you’re either coming out of a storm, heading into a storm, or are currently in a storm.
Either way, adjustments and storms are going to be involved.
Perhaps that sounds demoralizing. But the point is, a life of Christ-centered, Christ-exalting significance and hope doesn’t lie in the absence of adjustments and storms. If it did, only the privileged and comfortable would have any type of shot at a meaningful life (and Jesus has plenty of rebukes for the privileged and the comfortable in this life). Rather, it lies at the epicenter and heart of faith in Jesus. And I am learning to believe and trust in that.
In these coming months, there are fears I know I must have the courage to face; responsibilities and relationships to diligently pour into; burdens of shame that I need to learn to let go of. But all of that is impossible without faith in the God “whom even the winds and the sea obey” (Mark 4:41).
So may the winds blow through, and the seas roar and foam. My God is greater still.
Sola Dei Gloria.
In Him,
Andrew
Prodigal Musings 